Chie had woken up shortly before six o'clock, but even that early, Kuma was nowhere to be found. She had told him the night before that he would be welcome to come and go as he pleased, so long as he was careful, and discreet. (That in itself might have been a mistake, but she was determined not to coddle him...and she didn't at all savor the idea of having to keep watch over him every minute of the day.) Her deck door had been open that morning, so she figured that he must have left before sunrise, perhaps taking her advice to heart and trying his best to remain as unnoticed as possible. Just as well – she had wanted to stay on her weekly routine, and that included a Saturday day-off run.
She usually favored a route around town, but that meant that she would pass by Junes. She couldn't be certain if Yousuke was working, but she wanted to avoid him for the time being. There were apologies to be made, and she knew now that she would have to be the one to make them; but with Kuma's appearance, she hadn't been able last night to get things straight in her head. So she took her backup route, along the banks of the Samegawa River.
There were a few others about this morning, whom she recognized: Nagase Daisuke, of course, with a handful of more dedicated students from the high school team; Matsunaga Ayane; and Ichijou Kou, of all people.
Kou came running up beside her, pacing her. “Ohayo gozaimasu, Satonaka-san.” He must have been near the end of his route, because his dark hair was already sticking to his forehead in sweaty clumps, and his shirt was wet beneath his arms and in V-shaped lines down his chest and back. Still, he was smiling and seemed to be in good spirits.
Chie nodded and smiled back at him. “Ohayo gozaimasu,” she replied. “Nice day, huh?” she said, for lack of anything more interesting to say. She hadn't spent much time around Kou since high school, even given her closeness with Yukiko, who was very shortly to be his wife.
He nodded. “I'm determined to enjoy these mornings while they last.”
“While you're still single?” She ventured with a grin.
He laughed. “I meant before the rainy season starts.” He squinted at her. “This isn't your normal route, though. Don't you usually run through town?”
Chie slowed her pace. “How did you know that?”
Kou laughed again. “Don't worry – I'm not stalking you. I usually see you on the shop stretch in the morning, if I stay up at the inn.”
She smirked knowingly. “Oh, really? You stay up there that often, that you know my regular route?”
He faltered for a short second, his face turning red, and decidedly not from the exercise. “Ah. I think I'm not gonna answer that one.”
Chie chuckled; Yukiko was right about one thing: Kou was certainly capable of keeping the details of his private life to himself. She turned back to focusing on her speed and breathing. She figured that he would sprint away from her, or lag behind, but instead he kept pace with her.
“I hope you don't think I'm taking Yukiko-chan away from you,” he said abruptly.
Chie stopped, struck dumb by this unforeseen sentiment. “What? Ichijou-san, I don't-”
He stopped, too, to stand beside her. His voice dropped to a near-whisper. “I know that you're close to her in a way that I could never be. And that's okay. I think it's important for Yukiko-chan to have her own life, aside from me. But I hope that you won't begrudge me trying to make a life with her, too.”
She offered him a slow smile, suddenly understanding the true meaning behind this entreaty. “I have been a little jealous of the two of you, lately. But Yukiko-chan's still my best friend. I just want her to be happy.”
Kou smiled back at her. “I'm glad to hear that. I think she's been missing you.” He cocked his head. “I know what it's like to have a friend who's like another part of you. Sometimes you can't explain to other people just why they're so important to you....”
As if on cue, Daisuke and his small team of athletes ran past them, cutting a path around the two of them into the grass of the riverbank.
“Come on, lazy asses!” Daisuke shouted at the students. “How do you expect to beat Gekkoukan if you can't even keep up with me!” He paused briefly, to nod and grin at both Kou and Chie. Then he was off again, his shouts ringing out over the normally peaceful riverbank: “Umawashi, don't you roll your eyes at me! I'll make you run an extra five kilometers!”
Kou grinned at Daisuke's back and muttered:
“They just are.”
Chie followed Kou's gaze, and as she watched Daisuke and his student team run along the riverbank, she found herself thinking first of her friendship with Yukiko, yes...but then she thought of her friendship with Yousuke, too. Like Kou had said, both Yukiko and Yousuke were like parts of her own self, lost at birth and then found again as a girl. They were as much a part of her as her own legs or her own hands.
She looked at Kou again. “Ichijou-san...?”
He turned to her, his grin still in place. “Yeah?”
She bowed, legs and hands together. “Domo arigatou gozaimashite.”
He chuckled. “What are you thanking me for?”
She stood up straight again and offered a small smile. “For reminding me how important my friends are.”
Kou gave her a quizzical look but didn't press her further. Instead, he returned her bow. “Yukiko-chan and I are having sukiyaki this evening. We'd be delighted if you would join us.”
Chie nodded. “Sure, okay. Thank you.” She laughed. “But I should warn you: I can decimate a sukiyaki bowl!”
Early Evening.
Chie ran one hand over both her blousey shirt and her pencil skirt, in an effort to straighten any wrinkles or inconsistencies, as she stepped up into the Amagi Inn, where she had arranged to meet with Kou and Yukiko. Briefly, she inspected the box of delicate pastries that she had picked up as a gift and smiled at her choice. She didn't know Kou's tastes, but Yukiko had a particular weakness for sweet bean jelly. More than once during their friendship, Chie had been able to ply Yukiko's favor with confections like these. And while she had no ulterior motive in her choice this time, she was looking forward to the familiar sparkle of appreciation in Yukiko's dark eyes.
She was reminded suddenly of Kuma's big, bright eyes. Kuma had pleaded with her that afternoon; the poor thing had wanted so terribly to come with her to see Yukiko. But Chie wasn't certain that tonight was the right time to introduce Kou to Kuma...and she didn't know how even Yukiko would react to his sudden presence. He had whined about not being invited, and Chie had managed to placate him only after suggesting that they plan a very special get-together with Yukiko and the rest of their friends for the near future, when Kuma could be the center of attention. He had approved of this idea immensely, and so when she had left him, he had been wrapped in thought about how he could make the best entrance to his own party.
As much as Chie was happy to see Kuma again, she wasn't sure how much more of him that she could take all by herself. She wondered how Yousuke had managed it back when they were in high school....
She stepped into the lobby, and she almost fumbled over her own slippered feet when she saw him.
Yousuke was standing at the front desk, speaking in low tones to Sakai-san, the older woman who was head of staff at the inn. He was dressed in the casual remnants of what looked to be his work suit (tapered trousers and a button-down white shirt complemented by a red tie), his left hand holding a medium-sized wrapped box and his right busy writing in some sort of guest book. He looked up and then followed Sakai-san's gaze, which had gone to Chie when she had entered.
“Yousuke?” Chie had only been thinking about him, and now here he was.
Yousuke looked over at her with some surprise, his smile faltering, but only just. “Uh, hey.”
There was a long moment of awkward silence, while he turned to face her fully and she pursed her lips and stood there feeling like an idiot. He took a step away from the desk and toward her, and she gingerly moved her feet in his direction, too. They still said nothing, though, which made her both uncomfortable and fidgety.
Finally, he glanced at the gift in her hands. “I guess I wasn't the only one invited to dinner. What's in the box?”
Chie looked down. “Sweet bean jelly pastries from Saito,” she muttered. She nodded at the box in his hands. “What about you?”
He shrugged. “Matcha. There's a place in Tokyo that has some nice varieties.”
She clicked her tongue. “Thanks for making my gift look lame.”
“Hey, I didn't know you were gonna be here,” he murmured with noticeable derision. He turned his head and looked away from her, and she could hear the frustrated breath come from his nose.
While her initial reaction was to turn her back on him, too, she realized just as quickly that that wouldn't do any good. She had been invited to dinner as a goodwill gesture from Kou; picking a fight with Yousuke would tarnish that nice thought. So she stepped toward him again, reaching out one hand to him. At the same moment, he turned back to her, walking straight into her hand with his chest. They both faltered for a long moment, unsure of what to do next. Finally, they spoke, almost in unison:
“I'm sorry,” he muttered.
“I'm sorry,” she said. She turned away again, biting at her bottom lip, and fought the urge to chuckle at the absurdity of their situation. “What do you have to be sorry about?” She asked, still looking away from him.
From the corner of her eye, she saw him shift and shuffle his feet, and he said:
“I dunno. I shouldn't have stormed off like that yesterday. It was stupid.”
She shook her head. “No. I should be the one to apologize. I wasn't being fair.” Now she did look up at him, and she gave him a tentative smile. “You were right. I was...overreacting. What you do with your life is your business. I wouldn't want you judging me, either.”
Yousuke sighed, averting his eyes from hers. “It's not that. What you said...” He closed his eyes. “It's embarrassing.”
Chie glanced around; there were enough people milling about in their own dialogues that they were probably mostly ignored, but she didn't want to have this conversation so much out in the open. She touched his arm and, when he looked at her, she bent her head in the direction of the garden doors.
“Let's go outside,” she suggested in a low voice, leading him toward the external walkway. There were fewer people out here – just one couple, really, admiring the flora and rock garden – so she sat down on one half of a kartini bench along the wooden walking area. She offered him the space next to her, which he took.
She laid the box of pastries to her side opposite him and then put her hands in her lap. She wanted to lay her hand against his leg, or reach for his hand, but she didn't know how he would react to that. So she just knit her fingers together tightly, for fear that they might reach over to him of their own accord.
“Listen,” she murmured, “I don't think that... well, what I mean is....” She turned away, feeling suddenly insufficient to the task of apologizing. She hated the thought of risking another blow-up between the two of them, but she also felt the need to clear the air. She sighed, shoulders drooping, and glanced around the inner garden, until her eyes came to rest on the tall tree in the center, where so many wishes and fears and hopes had been said in the past.
Chie faced him again, dropping her voice to a hush. “Yukiko-chan is my best friend. We've been through so much together.” She paused, forming the words slowly: “I love her.” She did reach out, now, laying her hand lightly on top of one of his. He opened his mouth to speak, but she shook her head and shushed him. “I don't feel for her the same kinds of things I'd feel for a guy, but...I think if I could feel them for any girl, it would be Yukiko-chan.” She offered him a gentle smile. “It's okay for guys to feel that way, too. I mean, you and Seta were best friends....”
Yousuke sat back, blinking at her. “Um. That's...not what I was talking about. I was talking about Rise-chan.”
She straightened in her seat. “Oh. Uh, sorry.”
He leaned over his knees, putting his head in the palm of one hand. “Ugh. I can't even....” He sighed and dropped his hand away, then turned to face her again. “Listen, what happened with Rise-chan....” He shook his head, as if trying to shake the memories from his brain.
“You don't have to tell me,” she muttered, surprised at this sudden magnanimity. There was a part of her that was curious, and another part that wanted some justification from him...but mostly she just didn't want to see him hurt himself by telling the story.
He shook his head again, but the emotion was different this time. “No, I'd rather you hear it from me than somebody else.” He clasped his hands together and stared at them for a long minute. When she thought that maybe he wasn't going to say anything, it tumbled from his lips:
“She was in the city for some publicity thing, and she came by the school. I think maybe I'd told her once that the band I was in played shows on campus or something. You know, trying to impress the idol.” He chuckled, but it was humorless. He let go a long, low breath. “Everybody was so starstruck by her, and – I dunno. Maybe I was jealous, or part of me wanted her to myself, or...I thought she came just to see me.”
He paused, closing his eyes for a long second. When he opened them again, he snickered. “People do really stupid things when they're drunk.”
She smiled, despite herself. She knew how much damage Rise could do when she had too much to drink. He tended to have a little better self-control, but maybe not around the pretty young idol, and most certainly not if he was in a situation where he was trying to impress.
Yousuke sighed. “It was just...bad...you know? I mean, I was... I didn't know how to do anything.” He turned to look at her now, his eyes cloudy. “I was afraid she'd said something to you. About how much it sucked, or how totally clueless I was.” He looked away again, back to his hands, still clasped in front of him. “I was afraid you wouldn't want to be with me if you knew about that night.”
Chie watched him for a minute that felt like an hour. She blinked back tears, feeling foolish and reactionary and relieved. Then she reached up, curled her hand into a fist, and punched him, hard, in the arm. “Idiot!”
“Ow!” He turned to her quickly. “I'm sitting here pouring my heart out to you, and you punch me?!”
“Would you rather I kick your ass?” She asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
“No....” He rubbed absently at his bicep.
She giggled, softly. “We are a real pair, you know that?” She sighed. “When Rise-chan told me that you'd been...together...well, I was scared that you wouldn't want to be with me because I'd never be as good as her.”
Yousuke stared at her blankly, and then he broke into a grin. “And you call me an idiot?”
They both laughed then, startling the young couple in the garden and causing a few curious heads to turn in their direction from the lobby. One of those was Yukiko, who came out to them with a smile:
“So here's where you two are.”
Both Chie and Yousuke stood up, Yousuke offering her a low bow and his gift of teas. Chie followed suit, passing over the box of pastries with both hands.
“You guys didn't have to go to this trouble,” Yukiko said, bowing back as she accepted the gifts. As she stood straight, she gave them an apologetic smile. “Kanji-kun just called; the store has a rush order to fill tonight and he won't be able to join us. I hope that's okay.”
Chie followed Yukiko back into the inn proper, as Yousuke swung his hand to indicate she should go first. “Yeah, sure. Why not?”
Yukiko glanced back at them as she moved toward the stairs. “Well, without him, it might feel a little like a group date or something, just the four of us. I hope you don't mind.”
Chie spared an amused look with Yousuke, who grinned back at her. “Nope. Don't mind at all.”
Late Evening.
Chie bowed to Kou and Yukiko for a final time, then said goodnight. She slipped into her heels, wobbling a little as she did so.
“Whoa,” Yousuke muttered, grabbing her arm to hold her steady. “You okay?”
She turned to smile at him. “Yeah, I'm fine.” Her face felt flushed and there was a pleasant warming sensation that ran through her, but she knew that it had very little to do with anything that she'd drunk that night. She started to walk down the path from the inn, when he asked:
“Would you like a ride?”
“On your bike?” She smirked, reacting more to the double-entendre than to the offer itself.
He nodded, either oblivious to her subtle come-on (which was doubtful) or simply willing to surrender command of the situation to her. “If you think you can handle it.”
Chie snickered; he definitely was playing along with her. “Yeah, okay. That sounds like fun.” She followed him over to the familiar emerald Vespa and climbed on behind him, tugging awkwardly at the bottom of her skirt. She was thankful for the dark of the evening; anyone who saw her would have gotten a clear view straight up between her legs as she straddled the seat.
Yousuke turned his head back to her. “We'll go slow,” he told her. “But remember – hold on.”
She scooted forward, pressing up close to him. She put her arms around his chest, locking her hands around her wrists. “I've got you.”
They pulled away down the road that ran parallel to the walking path, slowly, just like he had said, with the motor thrumming beneath them, startling the crickets as they wound their way toward the main roads of town. She closed her eyes and sucked in a breath of the heavy night air, smelling the tantalizing mix of the engine and summer lilacs and the crisp cotton of his shirt beneath her cheek. She tightened her grip around him with both her arms and her legs, feeling the muscles in his torso and thighs relax and contract as he shifted his weight to make the turn at the corner of her street.
The cycle eased to a gentle stop, and as the motor purred itself to silence, she opened her eyes and felt a pang of remorse. These rides never lasted as long as she would have liked them to.
As he started to get up, she let her hands linger against him, drifting down to his waist. She hooked her fingers through the belt loops on his trousers, pulling him back into place. “Hey,” she said softly, nosing the loose hair at the nape of his neck. “You want to come up?”
He turned halfway around in his seat and looked back at her with a slow smile. “Sure. If you want me to.”
“Yeah,” she said as she climbed off of the bike, swinging her leg high over the back. She settled onto her heels again, feeling slightly swoony.
Yousuke followed her up the steps to the main door. “You sure you're okay?” He asked, steadying her with a hand on her waist.
“Never better,” she told him, making a shushing gesture with her finger as she led him up to her apartment. She unlocked her door and ushered him inside, glancing right and left to make sure that there was no one about to notice her bringing him home. As she closed the door behind them, he chuckled:
“Hey, your kotatsu's here.”
She nodded, tossing her keys onto the kitchenette countertop. “Yeah, they delivered it on Tuesday.” She lifted one foot and started to take off the shoe, when he stopped her.
“Wait,” he said, going down to one knee beside her. He lowered her foot, then began to work on unbuckling the strap that held her shoe in place. He slipped off the first shoe, and then turned his attention to the other.
Chie looked down at him, watching his slow, deliberate movements and feeling her pulse quicken at his touch. That familiar warm arousal spread through her, and she smiled. She stepped out of her second shoe onto the cool concrete, shifting from one foot to the other because it felt nice to be out of her heels, but also because he seemed to take such an acute interest in watching her legs.
As if to confirm her suspicions, Yousuke hummed appreciatively and ran his hand along one of her calves. “I love your legs,” he muttered. He circled his fingers around to the front of her leg and brushed his fingertips very lightly across her knee. Then he bent forward and kissed the skin just below the hem of her skirt, at first just a gentle brush of his lips against her thigh, but then becoming something more intimate as he raised his hands beneath her skirt, pushing the bottom up almost to her panties.
She stumbled a little, and a sound that was half-moan and half-sigh escaped from her throat. She ran her hand through his hair, hooking her fingers behind his neck to hold him close. She felt him nuzzle at the place between her legs, his warm breath sending excited little chills up her spine. He sighed back at her, the throaty hum of his voice causing her to inhale sharply and twist her fingers in his hair, pulling his head away.
He looked up at her with a lopsided smile. “I thought you'd like that,” he murmured.
She let go of his hair and instead wrapped the fingers of one hand around the length of his tie, pulling him to his feet. “You're just teasing,” she told him.
He snickered. “Well, now you know what it feels like.”
She reeled him in by his tie, until their faces were almost touching. She cocked her head to the side. “Is that all you've got to say?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Say? Yes. Do?” He moved one hand beneath her skirt, stroking his fingers over the lace trim of her panties. “No.” He cocked his head to the opposite side as her, almost-kissing the side of her mouth.
Of course, Chie runs into Daisuke in much the same way in the final version of Chapter 16, but Kou is nowhere in sight. Instead, I gave the reconciliation rendezvous moment to Rise, which I thought was a better character moment for her...even if she doesn't physically show up at all. I did miss a little bit of the characterization for Kou that was lost here (since he's essentially absent throughout the story so far), but I felt that it was diverting too much of the action and interaction away from Chie and those closest to her.
Yousuke's story is the same, of course; much of what happens in the ryokan garden is word-for-word the same as the final version that takes place at the azumaya. But I decided that I wanted to save the garden for a nicer moment between the two lovers (which eventually happens in Chapter 22, "Private Moment (Love Laid Bare)"...whose title was too long for me to have in its entirety on the Fanfiction.Net chapter title listing, which was a little miffing).
Readers will also notice that Kuma has already appeared by this time (as he did in the original ending of Chapter 15). The more I considered the direction the story was taking, I wanted to make the "rendezvous" part of the chapter title even more fitting: Chie is meeting again with Yousuke, but she's also meeting with Kuma again. It's just an example of the little parallels that I like to put into a story. I think that the finished version works much better, at least in that sense.
Now perhaps you'll understand how I can have over 300 pages of edited-out text in a story that is still over 600 pages long.
Posts
